By now, if you have been reading our articles, you know that both Kym and I are somewhat minimalist. Over the course of the weekend, while working with some friends, somehow the concept of minimalism got a bit trashed. I believe I’m not the best of the examples of minimalist living, but today I want to debunk the most common myths about minimalism. If I’m lucky, perhaps you will understand why it’s good to embrace it.
Minimalist is not being alone, it's understanding what belongs into your world. Photo by Steve Johnson.
Minimalism Myth 1: Minimalist own almost nothing
This one is tossed around fairly frequently. But it’s far from the truth. Some of the people I know that have embraced minimalism has truly tossed away most of their stuff and now live happily owning less. Those who travel a lot like Niall or Colin, truly own very little, but they are outstanding examples of owning less, but as I have encountered, they are not the majority.
The reason why minimalist usually own less stuff it’s because they try to form a deeper relationship with the objects they use and need. If you need a 1 thing or 100 things to live the way you are passionate about, please do so. Minimalism comes first from the understanding that not everything you own is needed. Most of the time we have stuff for the wrong reasons. That’s why I believe minimalism starts in your mind first and then it is reflected in the number of things you need.
Minimalism Myth 2: Minimalism like to buy cheap things
It’s true that minimalists often embrace frugality too, but they are separate concepts and usually the idea is to own something that truly will help you on the long run. Having cheap stuff is almost never the best way for a minimalist.
I am really picky about quality of the things I own, since I own very little stuff, I try to go for good quality and long duration rather than just having something cheap. In fact most of my friends know about my obsession with truly powerful computers, and those are expensive!
As I said, it’s all about the relationship you have with your stuff, if you believe a cheap object will help you then go for it. But cheap and quality are not usually related in a product, so more often than not, minimalists will own somewhat expensive things.
This is not set into stone, and it’s not a rule, this varies from one person to the next.
Minimalism Myth 3: Minimalism is for single people
I believe one of the most famous minimalists around the net is also the one that truly debunks this myth. Leo Babauta, who has inspired a lot of us to pursue a better way to live, is happily married with kids. He has also documented his experiences while embracing minimalism with a family.
If you haven’t noticed too, I have been tweeting material from Lorilee, she is a lovely lady who embraced minimalism and also documents very diligently her life, adventures and misadventures while living in a simple way.
It’s possible to embrace minimalism as a whole family and it is also possible to embrace minimalism while surrounded with people who are not into it. It’s all about communication and flexibility. Believe me, Kym and I know about this one, since our families are truly far from being minimalists.
Minimalism Myth 4: Minimalists are horrible parents
I believe this one is a clear opposite. I have met minimalist parents with wonderful and truly happy kids. That’s because they can pass the idea that stuff doesn’t bring happiness to their kids. I have no better example than Lorilee’s Minimalist Christmas series. She made an impressive impact on my concept of Christmas, but the core idea was simple indeed: “Create a way for the kids to have a wonderful time”.
They are not better parents either, they are just different and the sooner we embrace the idea that diversity is the best thing that can happen to this world, the better.
If there are any minimalist with kids reading this, please let me know in the comments your take on it, because this point would be very interesting to discuss.
Minimalism Myth 5: Minimalists have almost no friends
Also not true, minimalism doesn’t affect anyone but the minimalist, so there is no hidden rule about friends. Minimalism is not a secret club where only the chosen ones can enter and everyone is left out. It’s true that sometimes a minimalist will just let go of some friends, but that’s only because they are looking for more meaningful experiences and to truly connect with someone.
I do believe that people who embrace minimalism form deeper connections with their friends and are truly open about how they feel about it. That’s because minimalism is about having more of what it’s important to you. If your friends are something you value, then the result will be that you will be more in touch with them and care for the friendship a lot more.
My personal take on minimalism
For me, it’s not about what you own or what you don’t. It’s not about the people you meet and hang out with. It’s all about what it’s important to you and what it’s not. It’s about spending time with yourself and allowing you to understand your relationship with the world itself.
If you take the time to understand your relationship with stuff, people or ideas; you will take the time to move away from the things with less importance in your life, and you will embrace everything you love. So it’s not about counting things. It’s all about who you are and what you love.
Now, try to challenge yourself. Take a couple of minutes each day and learn about your relationship with everything that surrounds you. Then decide if you want to keep everything or just what matters, decide if minimalism is good for you or not.
If you liked this article, please share it around. Thank you!
About 
I smiled reading this because although I’m not really a minimalist, truth be told, I’m probably an aspiring minimalist. Christmas is a good example of this. I was very keen to help my three small ones move the focus away from more ‘stuff’ and to make it as much about family time, the fun of giving and of course celebrating Jesus’s birthday. We all had a fab time and have actually played with more of their gifts already than in previous years. I’d love to totally de-clutter this place and get rid of the unnecessary surplus. Just need to get hubby and the kids on board.
Hi El! It’s awesome to have you here.
It’s not easy to get everyone into the minimalist train, but with you could try to lead by example. For example you can donate your own surplus (thing that only you own) to charity, and tell your family how much good you are doing and at the same time you are allowing yourself to have more breathing room. Just an idea, but I bet you can come up with a lot of wonderful ways to get started.
Alejandro Reyes recently posted..5 simple tips to care for yourself
Love this, Alejandro! I’ve never put the label, “minimalist” on myself but a long time ago I decided I was no longer buying or keeping “stuff” just for the sake of it. Now…I make a conscious effort to only buy (or keep) those things I really love and that nourish my soul.
It’s amazing to have you here Lisa!
I also believe the label is not really necessary, it’s just that shift that we need to do. Just as you did, it’s all about keeping what truly nourish us. I’m truly happy to get your view on this matter, I think you sum it up in a wonderful way!
Alejandro Reyes recently posted..How safe is your work from a small accident?
I love your take on minimalism. It jives with my own. But as El put it so well, I have to also count myself as an aspiring minimalist. I was reminded again of my commitment to downsize and let go of an accumulation of ‘things’ when I helped my Mother downsize and move recently. Even though she was not a packrat by any means, her possessions became nothing more than a disposal problem!
This year is going to focus on getting rid of all that meaningless stuff that I own, and live more minimally with only those things that are useful and make me happy. This of course will by necessity be balanced by the desires and choices of my husband who is content to hang on to stuff!
Anne, it’s wonderful that you stopped by!
Don’t worry, as I told Lisa, the label is not the important thing, it’s how we relate to our world. If your mission is to downsize, do it consciously and even if you end up with a lot of things still with you, they will be meaningful and nourishing. I think that is is what minimalism is all about.
Alejandro Reyes recently posted..How to save the world in 2012
Great article. I will spread it around
I am bias though.
Minimalism is maybe just another term for intentional living. Having what you want in your life and living your own life instead of trying to live up to others expectations of you or impressing other people. Thanks for taking out the myths too. Embracing different people is a joy in life. It would be boring if we all thought and did the same thing.
Lorilee recently posted..Comment on A TV Free Home Is The New Black by Lorilee
Thank you Lori! It’s awesome to have you here.
You are right, I believe minimalism has that weird stereotype going around that it’s all about counting your stuff and living with almost nothing, but the reality is very different. That’s why I find your blog very refreshing, it’s more about how you live and how you choose your life. I had to mention it.
Alejandro Reyes recently posted..5 simple tips to make 2012 a better year
Like El, I am an aspiring minimalist – but I have a long way to go. I’ve made a lot of progress on eliminating possessions no longer needed or loved – but I have a sentimental husband, and I wrestle with insecurity about letting go. As always, your short (minimalist) to-the-point post helped to reinforce my convictions about the benefits of quality over quantity. I’ll just keep plugging away at chucking that excess stuff. But don’t touch my reference books – or my husband’s shelf of photo albums…:-)
Sarah / Wellness The Natural Way recently posted..Smudging: Clear Stuck Energy And Invite Postive Flow Into Your Personal Spaces
Hi Sarah! I’m glad you liked the post.
Don’t worry we won’t touch nor the books nor the photo albums. I think what really has value and nourish you shouldn’t leave. I keep a lot of things for coding reference and nobody dares to throw away my collection of Pen and Paper Role Playing Games. Oh, that was really geek right?
Alejandro Reyes recently posted..The healing power of humor and laughter – How to let go and have some fun
Too true Alejandro. If you can’t find a partner who’s values synch with your own then it’s happily ever after!
I wrote an essay (that’s a bit satirical) that pokes fun at the M word, you might enjoy:
http://andrewcaldwell.org/blog/waging-war-on-minimalism/
Andrew recently posted..Riches, Rags & Catheter Bags
Hi Andrew!
I believe there is always a way to find middle ground, minimalism is not for everyone and I’m ok with that.
I just checked your essay and I can’t say I truly enjoyed it. I think you go way too far, perhaps I’m not the only one that thinks that way if you had to edit it since Joshua felt offended.
Thank you for your comment!
Alejandro Reyes recently posted..Hall of Warriors Spotlight: Colin Wright
No probs Alejandro, there has to be a middle ground. I hope you took the essay as satirical. Offending theminimalist seems to be a punishable crime in the web 2.0
All the best,
Andrew
It is funny, and I particularly enjoyed the light-bulb joke, don’t worry too much I must also say that sometimes it is good to push that far.
You can view the other side of the coin, you did get a couple of comments by Joshua, which is quite hard. Success doesn’t always mean you get a smile.
Alejandro Reyes recently posted..How to save the world in 2012
If I’m honest Andrew, your post felt like link bait. I got the satire but with all the links to the big minimalism blogs, it was like you were just willing one of them to come over and disagree with you. I noticed you didn’t link to any of the Zen Habits posts and I couldn’t help but wonder if that was because comments there are switched off and as such, any trackback wouldn’t been seen by the readers?
But I see that your readers enjoyed it so that’s good. It just felt a little bit too mean in places for my liking but each to their own eh?