When you face uncertainty, are you able to answer questions like:
- What should I do?
- Where should I go?
- What is the next step I should take?
They may look like simple questions, but if your core values are not working and aligned as they should, you will never be able to answer them.
When I started my journey, most of my problems went back to answer those 3 questions. Before I could move one inch forward, I had to sit and find my core values. Once you have them you will see that they work like a charm, allowing you to overcome a lot of the uncertainty in your life. Let’s find them out, shall we?
What is a core value?
A core value is something you believe so deeply that it’s truly hard for you to change your mind. It would take an insane amount of force, or a truly traumatic experience for that value to change.
Think of them as filters that you wear at every moment. They allow you to decide if something is right or wrong. Note that your core values are different from mine even if we use the same words to describe them. That’s why I’m not making a list of core values, it would be pointless.
There is one huge trouble about core values, since even if you and me say that “Order” is a core value for us, we could end up arguing for hours on end to see who is right about it, or we could just agree so fast that the conversation about it could last only a few minutes.
Those core values or filters are so strong that they can spark a lot of conflict, but they can also guide your decisions and help you have a happier life. You just need to know they exist and how to use them.
How can you find your core values?
There is no simple answer for that question, but I will share my method, feel free to build upon it.
What I did to find my core values is to take a piece of paper and start listing all kinds of words that felt right to me. I ended up with a long list, around 10 to 20. Now leave that for a moment, because you could end up writing stuff that you want to be. I did that the first time.
Then, the next day or so, come back and from the list you have, circle the ones that truly call you again. Don’t write new ones. Just circle the ones that from one day to another still feel right. Leave it again.
On the third day, come again and from the circled ones just keep the 3 most powerful ones, the ones that still feel right and stand out. Those are your core values. If this doesn’t work, relax and try again, just don’t beat yourself if you end up with a lot of words that have no sense.
How do they work?
As i said before, your core values are some kind of glasses that allow you to see things one way or the other. That’s why you think a certain cat is cute and another one is funny. Another example is why you choose certain ideas over the others. No need to make any controversial comments here.
Knowing this and with the 3 values you uncovered, you can start shaping up the world around you. Let me give you an example, a bit funny.
I don’t like to wash the dishes. I truly don’t. This comes from the time I was a kid and instead of allowing me to play I had to wash the dishes. I know you must do it, it’s an important task. It’s also important to say that around here dishwashers are not a normal appliance in the kitchen. So you have to scrub them, in a somewhat big family, that is a lot of dishes!
When I did the exercise above, as you may have guessed, “order” was one of the words that stood strong. I like to keep things neat and in order, everything has it’s place and it saves me time. Isn’t washing dishes a part of the order of things in a house? Clean dishes ready to be used is a nice touch of order in any kitchen.
I never again thought of washing dishes as a horrible task, now I see it as a task to order the things around my life. It is something to be done to stay aligned with my core values. You can do this for bigger things, but even the smallest one can change your whole day.
Using your compass
As you can see you can change what you think of a task based in your core values. Unfortunately this is something you have to do yourself. It all depends on your values and how they work with your tasks at hand. But if you take the time to align your goals to your values, and your dreams too, you will be able to give a great meaning to your life.
That is how this blog started, as a place to share the experiences that we have and because it feels good to share what I learn in my journey. You can get some great value too.
Your mission for today is to start the exercise above, find your core values and then start aligning your daily tasks with your core values, this simple exercise will give you a lot of light in other areas of your life.
If you liked this post, please share it with your friends. Help more people to discover their core values and make their journey more meaningful and easier.